When Your Relationship Seems Like “Just One More Thing To Do”
Does Your Relationship Just Seem Like One More Thing For You To Do? If so, you may be experiencing relationship fatigue.
If you are a woman, I don’t have to explain to you that a woman’s work is never done. There are always at least 12 more things on your to-do list! Between being a mother, wife, employee and homemaker, it is easy to view your time with your boyfriend or husband at the end of the day as “one more thing that needs my attention.”
You might even start to think of your partner as being too needy or feel resentful that he cannot just see what needs to be done to help out. THEN you might feel like being intimate with him on a more regular basis. Sometimes, our problems seem so overwhelming that we forget that he, too, may just be trying to make it through the day.
5 ways to bring energy back to your relationship
- Recognize that you have to let him know what your needs are. He is not a mind reader…no, not even with you! Let go of the notion that “he should know” what you need and tell him.
- Look at it from his point of view. The tasks you think need to be done right now may not be on his “urgent” list. Talking to each other about who will do what and when can be extremely helpful in these situations. It is normal for couples’ agendas and timelines to be completely different.
- Make time to recharge everyday. Have you ever been running around, frantically trying to get everything done and your partner is kicked back, relaxing and watching TV? Instead of getting upset, look for ways that you can get more relaxation in your life. Evaluate your priorities and see what can be left undone until the weekend. Can some of your chores be hired out? Once you start looking at it, you can always find ways to fit more of “you” time into the day. Even 15 minutes can make a huge difference.
- Make time for things that matter. Your partner really matters to you, right? Remember the ways he brings companionship, intimacy and security to your life and how you two are building a future together. Isn’t that worth reserving some of your daily energy for?
- Think about how nice it feels to be appreciated, valued and cared for. Remember that he needs to feel these things too. Shift your focus to him and start giving him the things that you need in return. It’s funny how things like that circle back to you. Give it a try!
Putting your attention toward these five points will begin to reduce your relationship fatigue, and put back fresh energy into your partnership.